super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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