Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I forgot how hot balto sounded
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
I checked into jail on foursquare
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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