Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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