he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Randomize
