i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
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