____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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