garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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