I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Randomize
