Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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