I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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