got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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