wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
