I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
