her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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