Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
