she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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