I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
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