yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize
