the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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