It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I said "one day" and that day is not today
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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