My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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