Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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