I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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