There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
