i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
