first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
