I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Randomize
