there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
