Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Randomize
