Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
i drank out of a bidet.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Randomize
