What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
