It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
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