Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
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