if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Randomize
