we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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