I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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