I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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