I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
this is an emotional support booty call
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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