I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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