I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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