This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
