I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Randomize
