why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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