Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
You are the jesus of drinking
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Randomize
