I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Randomize
