how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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