We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
