Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Randomize
