is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I won't apologize to a one balled man
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize