I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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