I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
